on being and becoming a seasoned wedding guest

Guys.  What have you all been drinking?  I'm actually starting to lose track of all the wedding dates and the color schemes and the honeymoon destinations and the caterers and the guestbook options.  I suppose at 23, I'm at that stage where having several weddings on the docket for the next twelve months is absolutely normal (and, I'll admit, I kinda love it), but WOW.  This stuff takes some practice.  You all have different tastes, and you all register for different stuff (I seriously had no idea there were that many types of ladles out there.  Snaps for you).  I love you all dearly, and a band of cracked-out horses couldn't keep me from attending each of your special days.  But this post is kinda for you and it's kinda for your friends.

I'm loving and loathing quite a bit in the wedding world right now, so let's talk about it, ok?

I know all of you are capable of getting sick nasty with your florist.  And I mean that in the best possible way.  Please be creative!  Bouquets are getting so unique these days, and my favorites recently have been the ones that include big, blousy flowers and succulents.  It's like someone ran through a garden while being chased by Scotland Yard and just threw together whatever she could find.  And I'm eating it right up.

I know the dress is pretty much the most important part, and I'm not really prepared to make a sweeping commentary on what you pick.  You're all gorgeous.  But here's my favorite dress that I've ever, ever seen in my life (photographed by Millie Holloman Photography).  And that's all I'm gonna say about that.



I also hear this a lot:  "I don't really know if I want strapless or straps or one shoulder or sleeves because it's gonna be cold/hot and I adore/despise my arms but I also don't want to yank at my dress all night and I don't want to look stuffy/matronly/crusty so I want to be regal/soft/elegant/classy/hot but also not make anyone hot under the collar."  Great!  That should be easy.  No but actually, it might be.  Little gems like this bolero from Embee Style at Etsy should do the trick!  These little numbers are everywhere these days, and they can transform a dress in an instant.  They basically go, "Oh hey, what's up, Dress?  You lookin' good and all, but I'm about to make you the bomb dot com and also maybe a little schizophrenic.  Don't fight it."

Ok, awesome.  Let's move on to your bridesmaids.  They don't want to hate you.  They're your friends, or at the very least, acquaintances capable of pulling off that straight jacket of a dress you've had your eye on.  So, maybe don't torture them.  Maybe pick a dress they can wear to horse races and cocktails and (GASP!) other weddings.  They'll want to hug you, and more than that, if your guests are anything like me, they'll cheer extra loudly when you enter your reception because you didn't send your maids to battle against their gowns.  Now they can drop it like it's hot and Cupid Shuffle the way I'm gonna need them to in order to appear cooler than I actually am.

Hello, J. Crew.  You are the epitome of practical and rewearable.  I'm also loving dresses in colors that are close to white, but not quite white.  They just feel fresh and unfussy.

Ok, for those of you who are really, really like me and get invited as a guest to lots of weddings, let's break free from the registry for a hot second.  (If you're a bride who spent hours dragging her fiance through BB&B finding the perfect meat pulverizer, you may want to go ahead and click that friendly little red "X" in the upper right corner, because I'm about to rock your world.)  You actually can get kind of creative and avoid spending a fortune on presents the couple already knew they would get.  Remember my best friend Amanda's wedding?  Well, by the time her wedding rolled around, she had gotten so many things from her registry that I decided enough was enough, and I did this:

I framed the date!  There is actually a company called Frame the Date that will find/take pictures of numbers out in the wild and frame them for you, but they'll do it for close to $100, and that is insane.  I just searched for high-quality pictures of the right numbers (12, 18, and 10) on Flickr, ordered prints of them from Snapfish for about $3, and put them in a $15 frame from Michaels.  Ta-da!  I kid you not, it was her favorite gift, and even the least creative person on earth can do it.  I pinky toe promise.

Or, did your friend get married in a really fancy city?  Or one with a lot of history?  Dude, buy a map...

...and frame that sucker.  If you got married in New York City, wouldn't you want that in your house?!?  I would.

So, there you go.  All the thoughts that have been swirling in my head about weddings for the last three months spilled (or vom-ed, you pick) into one post.  My friends may have no idea what the heck they're in for.