Sunday, September 18, 2011

paul does fashion week: part three

In the very first Sunday post of my blog ever, I bring you...


The final installment of Paul's Fashion Week recap.  Enjoy.

Hello friends!

Here's Round 3. I'm tired, cranky, and facing the ol' ennui when it comes to viewing these lines. Maybe that's why I've never been to Fashion Week - the fashion gods know what's in my best interest. To wit, I'm currently stuffing my face with Oreos and wearing flannel pants with plaid house slippers (so, obviously my go-to-work uniform for reviewing the latest runways). 

To it:

1. Tadashi Shoji. I absolutely adored Shoji's line last year. He was new to me then, and I thought his designs were the bees' knees. I thought since last night was such an overall let-down, I would start off with a stellar designer tonight. I'm not usually a fan of ombre, but these designs are so taut that I hopped on board. Could I do without the structure-obliterating seams at mid-thigh? Absolutely. Are some of the looks reminiscent of dowager curtains? Why sure. But when you get down to brass tacks, you can't deny that the looks are graceful and buoyant.


2. Sophie Theallet. I hate pockets in evening gowns. I think practicality is rarely a priority when dressing up, but maybe I only think that because men's dress clothes allow for it. Furthermore, I hate the electric orange-and-blue patterned chaos. However, I love the T Straps that shod these models. Capitally classy. 


3. Thakoon. I'm pretty sure the main styling point of this line was high-end duct tape. With hats borrowed from a particularly bipolar, Country/Western Cruella deVil. This is a prime example of the evils that shiny material can convey. Not all that glitters is gold.


4. Tory Burch. I'll admit that it's refreshing to see models in kitten-heels rather than precipitous stilettos, even though I'm fairly certain the effect is stumpifying at best. Some looks are nice (like that grey coat), some looks are heinous (like all of her patterns), and some models have their high beams on (if you know what I mean) but by and large I can't help but wonder if a higher heel would help the line after all.


5. Marc Jacobs. Here's another line by the eponymous Marc Jacobs. Maybe if he spent less time diversifying his lines and spent more time on creating beautiful pieces, there would be......more beautiful pieces. But, cute coats, so there's that.


6. The Row. Before Fashion Week even started, I heard rumblings that The Row was the show to look for. Now that I've seen it, I'll know what to recommend for my next fancy-pants pajama party. 


7. I love how playfully haughty the Vena Cava line is. It all suggests fabulous, well-kept secrets of poolside innuendo and dinner-table footsie. I want in.


8. Eva Minge. I found myself consistently surprised that I liked this show as much as I did. I really enjoyed a new twist on a classic black-and-white theme (just think if the iconic Ascot Race from My Fair Lady had been styled by Eva Minge). Slide 63? I'd definitely hit the beach in that (please: White coat, shorty shorts, vertical stripes - these are a few of my favorite things). I'm going to go ahead and call it now: Eva Minge is my pick for unsuspected knock-out OF THE SEASON. 


9. Helen Yarmak. This line may not get PETA's approval, but it definitely gets mine if those furs are real. (What can I say? They're luxurious!)


10. Jeremy Scott. The HECK was he thinking? The denim atrocities. The fringe. The Holstein print. The gun holsters. THE CHAPS. If you aren't clutching your metaphoric pearls after witnessing this idiocy, I will appeal for your deportation.


11. Norma Kamali. YES. YES. YES. The classic fashion poses. The retro throw-back cuts. The modern take on a vintage classic (hello Slide 14!). Certainly some looks are ridiculous (are the pants on Slide 27 made of pink string cheese?!), some looks are ridiculously awesome (Slide 32, yes please), and some are just awesome (Slides 7, 18, and 23). I kind of want to hang out at whatever party these models are having.


12. Ralph Lauren is obviously gearing up for the newest The Great Gatsby release. I'd say that's a bad thing, but (a) TGG is my favorite novel, (b) the designs are ultra-feminine, and (c) just LOOK at Slide 50. You can't argue with that.


13. RAD by Rad Hourani. What's worse than a man-skirt, you ask? I'll tell you: A short maybe-man-skort. THAT'S WHAT. (Oh, and man garters. Those, too.)


14. I have become a crotchety old man (get off my lawn!) when it comes to viewing the drapy, swathy, figure-obliterating looks from designers that I used to love. Because they let me down, I decided to take a chance on Bibhu Mohapatra, and that chance scored YOOOGE. The harem pants I could do without, but what a line! The interesting but flattering cuts, the rich colors and fabrics - what a treasure trove! The right boob of Model 26 might be melting, but other than that I am so relieved to finally see a line I enjoyed looking at!


15. And here it is, my favorite look of the round, from one of my new favorites, Bibhu Mohapatra:

Honorable mention: Diane von Furstenburg. Her show landed on the 10th anniversary of the attacks on 9/11, and while her line didn't portray a particularly patriotic theme, her show was a subtle nod to the heroism and sacrifice of that day. 

Dis-honorable mention: Araks (dumpy and dowdy), Carlos Miele (caftans.....off the sheer variety.), Frank Tell (psssst, Frank....your zippers are showing), Kaelen (white-washed Pocahontas that still manages to be more oatmeal than actual oatmeal), Libertine (though your slight punnery on the French for "green bean" actually elicited a smile from my otherwise jaded existence, the smile was quickly replaced by a look of horror at the bedazzled man panties. HORROR I tell you), The Blonds (your Playboy motif is nothing if not subtle - just how many be-tuxedoed ladies did you throw down that runway?). 

And with that, we've wrapped up Fashion Week. Whew! 

I'll be reviewing my favorite pieces here soon, but until then I remain ever-faithfully yours,

Paul

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