it's madness, baby!

It's the mooooost wonderful tiiiiiiiime of the yeeeeeeeeeeear!!!  It's TOURNEY TIME!  (Ok, I admit, the beginning of football season is my favorite.  But this is still pretty darn exciting.)

So, here's my bracket!  (Click on it to make it bigger.)  I imagine a few of you Ohio people are going to take issue with my East region, but I don't give a flying buckeye.

Ok, but instead of justifying each of my decisions, which I'm pretty sure would bore you to tears and make me fall asleep here at the computer, we're just going to make another bracket together.  The Mascot Bracket.  We'll start with the weirdest/creepiest mascot in each region.

Representing the East region, we have Gunston, the George Mason Patriot?  Really?!?  What about this mascot is a) intimidating, b) red, white, and blue, or c) not something you wouldn't mind your five-year-old snuggling up to at night?

In the Southwest region is the Akron Zip.  Or the Akron Kangaroo.  Or the Akron jumping dog with MC Hammer pants and restricted movement.

Weighing in for the West region is the Hampton Pirate, a puffy character who is remarkably white for an HBC school.  Also, jury's still out on whether that's the correct way to hold a sword.  Looks a little unwieldy to me.

And checking in for the Southeast region is a Gatorade lawsuit waiting to happen.  St. John's Red Storm may be one lightning bolt zag away from having to legally spend half his time asking you if it's in you.  Or contending that his better is better than your better.

I'm going to confidently assume that one round with the Hampton Pirate is going to have the George Mason Green Fuzz on the hunt for his pacifier and Teddy Ruxpin, despite Hampy's poor sword skillz.  Let's put the Pirate in the finals.

The other regions are a little more complicated.  It's Zips versus zaps.  A creature unequivocally foreign to the Ohio area versus a bird with more facial tattoos than Mike Tyson.  The Zip can jump, but the Storm can fly (maybe?).  St. John's in the finals.

So that leaves us with Mr. Water Retention taking on Red Bird Lightning Wings in the finals.  Challenger of the High Seas versus Oddly Colored Storm.

Well, I mean, let's be honest.  The bird's gonna drown that sucker.

Honorable Mentions:

The UCSB Gaucho, with a mustache that would make Chris Hansen nervous.

And the Richmond Spider, with about four too few limbs and a widow's peak that would make Eddie Munster jealous.

Regardless of who wins this year, I hope you all filled out your brackets and are ready for the madness!